Lengthening of the day

I had an idea, a characteristic in mind to write about which has been annoying my subconscious and pushing me in a direction opposite to the one I tend to take at times. After scrolling Facebook, the thoughts and conversations of this season, I am convinced a lot of us are living from a similar place – for some it is our default.

I watched a video of an Asian girl doing a makeup tutorial who’s title I refuse to repeat as it is a lie that should be banned from all media (the title, ridiculously enough, is what made me watch it to see if I could comment on it).

She was a beautiful girl. Then she Manga-fied herself with the use of loads of makeup, fake eyelashes, contacts and tape on her eye lids. Then she smiled as if she had just become a complete person, with the wholeness, confidence, strength and beauty needed to take on the world. My heart aches to think she has no idea how beautiful, whole and strong she was before one bit of work or effort went into that mask.

As I sat trying to get over these images and emotions the niggling in my heart become louder. You see I came home from work tonight set on getting things sorted in my flat, cleaning, washing and to make a plan for the week for food etc. (all good things mind). After rushing around for a bit I realised I had not said a proper hello to my cat who was patiently waiting for me to give him the time of day. So I cuddled him for a bit, fed him, then made a cup of tea and sat down. Man did that feel good. Sitting down.

I just sat and thought about what I really wanted (apart from that cup of tea). Turned out what I really felt like doing was some Yoga. So I spent the next half an hour breathing, stretching, decompressing and lengthening myself.

I had got myself all tight and flustered and tired from all my effort all day long. It felt so good to just be, to enjoy lying there breathing. To realise again, afresh, that there is more to me than what I put on. More to who I am than what I do. Even more to my existence than all I wish I could be and do.

I love this season. The sunshine warming up the beginnings and endings of the days. The daylight hours stretching and lengthening.

I’ll get to my dishes and plans at some point this week but what else will I get to? Trying harder or working more? Purposing to be more disciplined and end up worrying the time away? Shrink through fear and effort?

Or I could sit down more. Ask myself who am I? In what ways am I whole, beautiful and strong? What have I got to celebrate at the beginning and ending of today?

What can I free myself up for rather than tie myself down to?

Wouldn’t it be great if we did less that causes us to resent and more to truly enjoy the lengthening of the days.


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